HijiNKS ENSUE
Thoughts on why we force people to “come out.” 
I wanted to post panel 3 from this comic, with the accompanying blog post here since people seem to be relating to the sentiment and I want them to have an easy way to share it. 

[Jodie Foster’s Golden Globes] speech may have been an odd, stream of consciousness (albeit joyous and life affirming) ramble-fest, but anyone reporting confusion as to whether or not she publicly affirmed her sexuality or not just weren’t paying attention at all. She spelled it right out and did so with confidence and class.
I’m anxious for the day when a well known woman can get on a stage, talk about her achievements and thank her wife (or ex-wife in this case) for her support without first having to ADMIT to her sexuality. When I (a straight, white man – the lowest difficulty setting) get up in front of strangers I don’t in any way feel compelled or obligated to discuss my sexuality. I don’t feel nervous that they are assuming thing about who and how I love. And if I said “…and my wife was there,” no one would blink an eye. Actually, someone might think, “Oh, he’s married. I didn’t know that.” Which is exactly how the thought process should work when Jodie Foster starts talking about her kids and casually mentions the woman she is raising them with. “I’ve got new information and the sexy details are none of my business.”
I wasn’t really planning on writing a mini-rant this morning, but this is something I think about a lot. Primarily because, while INCREDIBLY close to the the real life truth, panel 3 up there in that comic conceals a lie. When Josh actually came out to me via instant message all those years ago, I was SUPER freaked out. Not because he was gay, but because I didn’t KNOW he was gay. We had been friends for years and I just thought he was terrible with girls. When I received the new information, I made the erroneous and selfish determination that he had been lying to me for our entire friendship. EHHHHNNN! Wrong. The truth, which I understood much later, was that our friendship had not yet progressed to the point that he was comfortable discussing sexuality with me.
I realized what a dick I had been when I started to think about all of my other straight friends who NEVER talked to me about who they desired bang times with or in what ways they wished for said banging to bang. People are not obligated to reveal their sexual details with anyone. The only reason gay people are even expected to “come out” is that we (even the most enlightened of us) still consider straight to the the baseline and gay to be the aberration  “I will assume you are straight unless you otherwise inform me,” is the most common attitude when it should be, “You seem to have brown hair and like to wear ironic t-shirts. If I want to know anything else, I’ll have to get to know you better.“

Thoughts on why we force people to “come out.”

I wanted to post panel 3 from this comic, with the accompanying blog post here since people seem to be relating to the sentiment and I want them to have an easy way to share it. 

[Jodie Foster’s Golden Globes] speech may have been an odd, stream of consciousness (albeit joyous and life affirming) ramble-fest, but anyone reporting confusion as to whether or not she publicly affirmed her sexuality or not just weren’t paying attention at all. She spelled it right out and did so with confidence and class.

I’m anxious for the day when a well known woman can get on a stage, talk about her achievements and thank her wife (or ex-wife in this case) for her support without first having to ADMIT to her sexuality. When I (a straight, white man – the lowest difficulty setting) get up in front of strangers I don’t in any way feel compelled or obligated to discuss my sexuality. I don’t feel nervous that they are assuming thing about who and how I love. And if I said “…and my wife was there,” no one would blink an eye. Actually, someone might think, “Oh, he’s married. I didn’t know that.” Which is exactly how the thought process should work when Jodie Foster starts talking about her kids and casually mentions the woman she is raising them with. “I’ve got new information and the sexy details are none of my business.”

I wasn’t really planning on writing a mini-rant this morning, but this is something I think about a lot. Primarily because, while INCREDIBLY close to the the real life truth, panel 3 up there in that comic conceals a lie. When Josh actually came out to me via instant message all those years ago, I was SUPER freaked out. Not because he was gay, but because I didn’t KNOW he was gay. We had been friends for years and I just thought he was terrible with girls. When I received the new information, I made the erroneous and selfish determination that he had been lying to me for our entire friendship. EHHHHNNN! Wrong. The truth, which I understood much later, was that our friendship had not yet progressed to the point that he was comfortable discussing sexuality with me.

I realized what a dick I had been when I started to think about all of my other straight friends who NEVER talked to me about who they desired bang times with or in what ways they wished for said banging to bang. People are not obligated to reveal their sexual details with anyone. The only reason gay people are even expected to “come out” is that we (even the most enlightened of us) still consider straight to the the baseline and gay to be the aberration  “I will assume you are straight unless you otherwise inform me,” is the most common attitude when it should be, “You seem to have brown hair and like to wear ironic t-shirts. If I want to know anything else, I’ll have to get to know you better.

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    WORD.
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    Is it really that bad to assume ‘straightness’ at first? I mean, if I like a guy I don’t want to have to say ‘hey,...
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    *applaud*
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